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Cultural Concubine Blog

Neither here nor there…

A fallen woman?

At least that is what the word ‘Valens‘ the origin of the name for Saint Valentine really stands for.

Anyone who has really engaged in this trapeze act called Love, knows it looks so easy, pretty and graceful from the ground.
But once hanging up there yourself, you see it really is not for the faint hearted…
Everyone who has ever been dropped or let slip can tell you: It really is a long way down…

Still once you have been up there and with the fresh air in your face, you know you can never go back living on the ground…

We all know what that feels like...

A long time ago Jesuit novice (yes I know this is an interesting source) once informally told me, that in order to be a man you need balls, to be a man of love you need bigger ones!
(may be the kind of advice St. Valentine should have had! Performing Christian Marriages, what was the poor dear thinking?!)

Then there are other explanations, stating that the whole Valentine’s craze is an invention by Chaucer, or simply a continuation of an originally pagan feast called Luperculia. Any celebration helping to avert evil spirits and purify the city, releasing health and fertility has to be great fun!

The bastard! He knows I hate pink...

Still what for me the main point really is, that this whole feast should not be about, boxes of sticky chocolates, red balloons and smelly bath salts. (because you genuinely don’t have a clue what she wants anyway)
It should be the furthest thing from the soppy side of love… The celebration of contentment, of satiety and boring comfort, commercial expectations… and arguments about getting presents wrong…  NO!

Instead let Valentine celebrate valour, courage and the brave!
The people that truly dare to let their heart speak out, the people who send a letter filled with blatant honesty or a card coated in truth. (whatever colour the bloody stationary might be..)
Why is it such a crime to tell someone you really like them?
Isn’t a tepid guilt propelled message much more harmful?

In other words... NO!

I would much rather get a clear response turning me down, than being politely strung along to ‘spare my feelings’
(?! They are mine right, so why not let me take care of them…).
Better to crash and burn, then to stay suspended in dishonest promises and unmeant words…
Indeed we all know safety nets don’t work in Love…

Come on, Fortune favours the brave.
So if you still have a heart, use it!

Bon courage for the 14th!

PS I hate red roses. (now you know why)

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